Hey ! So this is your first trip together and you’re freaking out on how to make sure it goes well?
Travelling with a partner for the first time is definitely exciting but it’s also scary if you have no idea how suited you are to each other as travel partners.
A well-planned out, seemingly thrilling holiday itinerary can turn into an irritating and notoriously annoying experience to which you may refer back every time you have a fight for the rest of your life!
Now that’s something no one wants to deal with.
So what do you do? Well it’s actually a lot like getting married or deciding to permanently live with each other. Travelling together can be a big test of the relationship. In fact if you’re going on your honeymoon, this is pretty much a preamble for the years to come.
All you really need to do is to be considerate about each other’s needs and likes, stay positive and reasonably tolerant and focus on the fact that you’re there to have fun and enjoy each other’s company. A lot like life eh?
So if you’re fretting about going on your first trip with your soul mate, here’s your travel mandate to make sure it all goes right. And if you still make some mistakes, you’ll at least learn some lessons for the next one!
- Plan but no surprises. Though a honeymoon or a trip with your love is a time to relax and forget about the rules, one thing you don’t want is to be annoyingly taken by surprise. That’s why both partners should be involved in the planning, in on the budget and especially the itinerary.
Mutually decide places and schedules for sightseeing and other holiday activities along with times to rest, sleep and eat so that neither of you lose your enthusiasm because of burnout.
Also unless you know your partner really well you might want to hold back on the surprises. If you don’t know what he/she really likes it could be a mood-spoiler and a point of contention for many years to come. Take the risk only if you’re absolutely sure that it’s going to be appreciated.
2. Accommodate and adjust. Try your best to accommodate each other’s likes and dislikes so that the trip is equally pleasurable and satisfying to both. There are always going to be times during the trip when he/she wants to do something that you don’t or you’d really like to go somewhere or eat something that the other can’t stand thinking of. Like I said it’s a preamble to the future. Give and take is what constitutes long term happiness especially on a holiday when you’re going to be in each other’s face 24×7!
Being accommodative essentially boils down to being sensitive to your partners needs. It could be anything from travel sickness, to their desire for “me time” or even their enthusiasm to do something which you wouldn’t even think of attempting. This is really how you get to know each other.
3. Chivalry applies to both. That “male chivalry” thing went for a toss more than a decade ago. Unless you both like it the old fashioned way (now make of that what you will), neither should expect the other to make all the arrangements. In fact to repeat myself, both should be actively involved. Share the burden and divide the load. That way there’s no finger pointing to spoil the excursion.
The crux is to be a team. Chip in with what you’re good at and give way for your partner to handle and arrange things that he/she does better than you. This is definitely something which will stand you in good stead for your life together. Doing things as a team has no substitute for lifetime memories.
4. Be grateful, keep your cool. Sounds like something out of a “teach-your-children-how-to-behave” manual. You may not realise just how much being appreciative and showing gratitude can calm frayed tempers and prevent irritable outbursts (sure spoilers for a first-in-a-lifetime holiday).
When you’re out on a holiday with the person you’ve decided to spend eternity with, the one thing that will stay with him/her forever is if you lose your cool or embarrass him/her in public. That is something no partner will forgive you for the entire span of your life, especially if this is your first time together. Things may go wrong, just don’t lose it. This is definitely not the time or the place.
5. Mix and mingle. No I’m not talking about the drinks. Meet new people, double date with another couple whom you’ve never met before, in short don’t keep to yourselves. That way you’ll learn more about different places, people and even about each other! Not to mention how much more fun the variety will offer.
6. Go your separate ways together. What I really mean is keep a book or Kindle handy. Just because you’re on your honeymoon or a romantic holiday doesn’t mean you shouldn’t give each other mental space. Alternatively go solo. Plan to spend some time alone like at the spa, gym or beauty salon or even go for a walk. Staying away from each other for a while intensifies the joy of being together the rest of the time.
7. Look good, feel good, bond well. Kapische? A lot of travelling, sightseeing, trying-to-make-time-for-everything-on-your-schedule can sometimes take the energy out of you. But making that extra effort to look good for yourself and your partner goes a long way in making the time together feel special. Dress up, smell good and watch your partner notice the heads turn.
8. Lap up the adventure. Don’t shy away from adventure or something slightly audacious. Be different, you might not get another opportunity. There’s always a first time for everything. Do what you’ve never done before together (as long as it isn’t dangerous) and you’ll have something to smile about every time you relive the memories.
9. Guard your valuables. Nothing will upset the fun more than losing your valuables or luggage in a new place on your special holiday. Try not to get distracted by the wonders and excitement of your trip with your love interest, take care of your belongings the way you take care of each other. You don’t want to risk hearing about it for the rest of your life!
10. Don’t forget the essentials. Remember to take your selfie stick or even a tripod if you like collecting memories that way. Cameras with self timers will help you get those awesome couple shots. Make sure you’ve got lots of pictures to show your future kids one day.
11. Be a learner. If you haven’t travelled together before there are going to be lots of surprises that you’re in for. Some pleasant, some not so pleasant. Learn to “go-with-the-flow”, make this a time to learn more about your partner and like I said stay cool. If there’s something that’s going to completely mess up the memories it would be for you to fly off your handle because you can’t stand one of his/her habits.
12. Communicate. If something’s really bugging you – talk about it. Not “having-it-out” can spoil the rest of the holiday and make you grumpy and very bad company to say the least. Be positive but let off the steam – albeit gently – to help your partner understand what’s eating at you. Basically stay human without hurting his/her feelings.
13. Make time to feed the stomach. In all the excitement don’t ever forget mealtimes or postpone them for what at the time may seem like “something more exciting”. Good food is essential to keep both your tempers and your energy intact. A growling, grumbling stomach can interfere with your affections or even make you ill. You don’t want migraines, diarrhea or acidity on a honeymoon. Factor in your mealtimes for a successful holiday.
14. Shun social media. Though it is gratifying to share your joy with friends and family, keep it off until you get back. Being constantly occupied with taking selfies/pictures, uploading them to twitter or FB and then going back to check and like people’s comments, is going to make your partner feel like he/she is on a holiday all by himself/herself. It can be annoying to put it mildly and can irritate the hell out of your mate.
The up side is that you’re bound to learn a lot about yourself and your partner and become better at travelling happily together without spoiling the good memories. It takes some effort, but in the end it will spare you a lot of heartache and ensure you have an amazing time with your mate.
Finally like Elbert Hubba once said “the greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one”.
Plunge in and improvise as you go. The fun will follow.
Get set to post those pictures and change your status on FB! Happy honeymooning.